Wednesday, September 12, 2001

How to Serve Man




How to Serve Man
(a cookbook)











Sept.
12, 2001

The Sun is rising once again over that bend on the Kit Carson Highway,
where, just yesterday, a Yeti stumbled out from the woods and got
himself roadkilled.

I listen to the radio, and feel a strange emotion. The news confirms
the horrible suspicions I have had, concerning the destination toward
which Your Social Reason (URIZEN) is trying to deliver us.

When we tune in to Paranoid Alien Radio, we hear warnings of what the
Starlords who shape the policies of the Paranoid Aliens are
attempting.

As I listen to Paranoid Alien Radio, I am trying to follow a recipe, so
that I can bake me a new loaf of cornbread to replace the one that
became just as charred as my innocence while I listened to
yesterday’s mews.

When I tune in to CNN, I see what Paranoid Alien Radio is trying to warn
us about. We look at the new converts to the Cult of the Starlords
wandering through the ruins of the New York City World Trade Center.
They are not deterred by the yellow police tape; apparently, neither
fire nor falling objects can hurt them any longer. Whenever they
encounter someone who is still one of us, they proseletize and hand
him a copy of what is apparently their Holy Book.

The golden Old Manuscript lettering printed across the crimson leather
covers spells in English, How to Serve Man. It is so marvelous
that, in our time of peril, the legions of the Starlords have come
down to give us a hand.

Our enchantment is dampened when a Jewish professor from the University
informs us that he has seen that kind of leather before. In the
Holocaust Museum at Belsen. It is a type of hide with a grain that is
unmistakable. These Bibles have been bound in human skin!

The Jew then produces a Kabalistic device of diamonds and symbols that he
calls the “Tree of Life.” Using this diagram as a decoding
instrument, he shows us what the main chapter headings say, in the
Language of the Constellations. For instance
  • Make
    sure you remove the entrails
  • Which
    body parts can be eaten, and by whom.
  • Skinning
    the hide, and preparing it for market.
  • Human
    Thigh, stuffed and roasted over hot coals
  • How
    to prepare breast, belly, and back meat.
  • Warning:
    human hearts are always the property of your expedition commander.
    How to offer them properly.
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who still is sufficiently in touch with the Four Directions, that he is able to do a rain dance and bring down real rain? 


“So how do you like me now?”

Unmistakably, this is the Corn Mother with an attitude.

“Do you think that all that screaming just came out of New York?” she challenges me. “Will anyone dare to ask me, why the White Snake and the Black Snake are fighting?”

The corn husks which cover her breasts are beginning to spread apart. My attention is fixed on the cleft between her breasts.

“When the Angel of Death looked down on the two pyramids that had been raised up in lower Manhattan by the Priests of the Proud,” she explains to me, “she didn’t see anything that even looked like menstrual blood painted on the roof-combs. And you will have to realize that the children who have died from malnutrition and preventable diseases are driving that Fury crazy by demanding to know why their brothers and sisters are going to have to die too.”

Something is now screaming in my oven. When I look in, I see two witnesses howling in death-agony as they lie on a blockaded street. A NASA van roars in from Houston and is admitted through the police line. The two carcasses are loaded aboard for transport to the National Testing Grounds at Alamagordo. 

Eventually, after the fighting is over, and all of the tests that the U.S. government treasury can be billed for are performed, the stuffed hides shall be delivered to the International UFO Museum & Research Center on Main Street.

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Do you call it revolution? I rather would consider, the social historians 100 years in the future shall call it, the creation of a new calendar of civilization.
In 2012, so they say, the ancient Maya calendar shall have traversed the 25 Intercalary Years between the Old Calendar which ended in 1987, and the New Calendar, which shall only be given to Man, if the Lady Who Is Crowned by the Sun is pleased with what She sees.
According to all traditions, an Intercalary Period of this sort is extremely perilous. During this time when the Lady of the Sun and the Moon is deciding on whether to give the Human Race a new calendar, all of the four-footed brothers and sisters, all of the winged brothers and sisters, all of the brothers and sisters that swim, waddle or crawl, shall be asked to give their testimony, on how the Two-Legged tribes have treated the world which they have been given. Even the Tree People who are rooted in the forests and the jungle shall be asked to give their testimony.
There are legal complaints which all of these parties have filed, over the nature of the stewardship exerted over the Planet Earth by it’s reigning Intelligent Species. As a result of these complaints against Mankind, it is predicted that the advent of the New Calendar shall be signaled by severe disruptions of the seasons


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Tuesday, September 11, 2001

The Only Thing We Need to Fear

Good morning out there. This is Paranoid Alien Radio, broadcasting on 1519 killing hurts. We’re just here to warn you that if you aren’t paranoid, you simply aren’t facing reality.
This is Paranoid Alien Radio, letting you know that the aliens have already landed. Hey you, with your shining new car – you who know everything there is to know about the stock market, but who have lost touch with the cycles of the seasons. Can you prove that you are not an alien yourself?
Hello, Paranoid Alien Radio. My name is Prince Ranito. I was the Frog King who lost his fine tail. I’m just calling in to invite you to the big party the Aliens are going to be hosting in the World Trade Center of New York, in September of the year 2001.
This is the legendary Frog Prince, who used to be able to boast of the world’s finest tail, telling you about a few details that Edgar Casey left out, in his surreal effort to resurrect both the medicine and the mythology of the dispossessed Cherokees. Edgar Cayce was able to show us, that the tail of Plato’s Atlantis would fit nicely on the Bear who went ice fishing.


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Forgotten now, the honeymoon days of our liberal hopes, when we were able to believe that culture could create a revolution without Marx or Jesus. Once more, the Cycle of Violence has reached the point at which Bad Gods are able to demand human sacrifice.
 
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September 11, 2001

In the Sangre de Cristo Mountains
A Yeti stumbled out on the highway
And was roadkilled.
It was stuffed and put on display.
When carbon-14 dating has been perfected
This single specimen shall be able to tell us
The story of so many beasties whose hearts were torn out.

I would speak of the carnage on the road,
When headlights hypnotize animals,
But we also are standing in shock,
Having lost our voices.
It’s hard for us to speak with one another:
When the Yeti died, everything natural within ourselves
Died also.
Yet the momentum of outrage,
Tsunami of the 21st Century
Approaches the shore with a driving ultimatum.
This escalation of terror can only be countered
By a revolution of the spirit.
Otherwise, Stalin and the Jacobins
Shall play their Heavy Metal on the economic pyramids,
While the old Aztec Gods
Grow even fatter than before.

Here, beside my breakfast cornbread
My telephone stumbles in shock.
It is not as though it had never stuttered before:
This horrible day in September when innocence dies,
When the emerald weeps blood,
When the different floating continents
No longer fit together.

We look out from our open graves;
We are free to walk into the world,
But we know that the once-born shall flee.
These once-born are running like rabbits,
Because our vision of an exploding world
Has changed us to foxes.


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